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Now, you may ask yourself, what's the connection between arousal and the g spot? Well, the g spot is best found and stimulated when you are completely turned on. If you try to stimulate it before it can be hard to find, and stimulation can be uncomfortable or even painful. The best time to explore the g spot is when your partner is so hot she’s begging you to be inside her.
To help you get to that place quickly and easily, we’re focusing this article on getting you both highly aroused - quickly and easily. Speaking of arousal, did you know the most important part of the body for arousal is ... the mind? Yes, its not the clitoris, the penis, or any erogenous zone. Its the mind. About 75% of arousal comes from the mind (especially for women).
So, guys, I’ve created a sample evening to use with your partner, and worked in many small techniques to build arousal. I suggest you read this over, completely, and then plan an evening with your partner this week and follow the steps:
1) when you wake up, tell your partner that you love her, and then share two or three things you enjoy about being with her. When you are sharing this, focus on speaking from your root ... you may notice often your energy is in your head, or your throat. Use your breathe, and your awareness to speak from your sex. Speak with heart, and with emotion. be real!
2) tell your partner that you’ve planned a super sexy night for her, and that you have a surprise for her as well. (DO NOT TELL HER WHAT IT IS!) This will let your partner know that tonight is not a normal night. It will also make her think about it all day. This is what you want.
3) don’t spend much time with your partner that day. be out, be busy. its important to have physical seperation, to build a bit of distance.
4) however, make a point to call her and say that you love her and are looking forward to going out later that night. by now, she’ll likely be telling her friends how strange you’re acting! : )
When you are out that night, do whatever you would normally do: cook-in, go out to a nice restaurant, have wine, cocktails, etc.
5) However, when you first greet her, make a point to hug/kiss her with love and intensity. Also, create an excuse to whisper something (anything) in her ear, and let your breath linger on her neck.
6) Then, throughout the evening, create excuses to massage her shoulders, touch her arm or leg, be close to her, etc.
Now, you can do all these small techniques things at any time, on any day. (In fact, I recommend you do them all the time!). I’m just framing them over an evening date to make them easier to teach you.
Its likely by now that she’ll ask you about your surprise ... don’t tell her what it is. Keep the suspense and mystery. Feel free to be playful – but don’t tell her.
Now, its after dinner, you’re coming back home. Tell her that the first part of the surprise is that you’ve planned a special evening once you get back. Say, I’m going to give you a cocktail (or a glass of wine, etc.) when we get home and go upstairs and prepare.
This makes her even more curious, and lets her know you’re taking care of everything. Women generally find this super sexy.
Go to your bedroom, and set things up. You’re going to be doing some massage and sexual exercises with your partner. Prepare for that, and then invite your partner into the space.
Now, in this part of the evening, you’re going to experiment with some simple exercises that build attraction, arousal and intimacy. Again, you can use these techniques any time, together or separate. I’ve just put them into an evening activity as a way to teach them (it also makes for a great night of fun!)
1) tell your partner that you’ve designed an evening to help create intimacy and arousal. that neither of you will be orgasming tonight – that’s its about loving each other, and getting hot and sexy – without the pressure of orgasm. (you heard me – don’t have an orgasm ... take away the predicable path ... you’ll get much more hot for each other, and its good practice. trust me!
2) take a few minutes to share a bit about what you appreciate and admire about each other. we often don’t do this with our partners. share 2 or 3 things each.
3) now, take a few minutes, to look into your partners left eye. sit quietly, be present with each other, feel your partner. if you mind wanders bring it back. this is a small exercise to build presence and intimacy. it will likely feel quite weird in the beginning. do it anyway!
4) if it seems appropriate share a bit about how that ways, and try it again
5) now, take 5 minutes to kiss each other. pretend you’ve just met. explore each other. kiss as if that’s all you are going to do tonight, not as an excuse to get to have sex. explore her lips, tongue, neck, ears, chin, throat, etc.
6) you will likely get bored and want to move on. don’t! i’ve done workshops where you have to kiss 1,000 times differently. be creative. push through the normal patterns. we are retraining how you approach sex. slowing you down. re- awakening your senses. building creative muscle.
7) after this, lay your partner down, and put a blindfold on her. (if you don’t have one, you can use a scarf, or something else)
8) take 10 or 15 minutes to touch your partners body. NOT HER CLITORUS OR VAGINA. enjoy yourself. if you are having fun, you will be much more present, and amazingly enough, it will feel much better to her. experiment with different kinds of touch: hard, fast, slow, soft, circular, fingernails, pads of fingers, feather, silk, tongue, lips, cold breathe, hot breathe, something warm, something cold, etc. track your partner’s response. what you are doing should be turning her on. if its not, try something different, and check in with her
9) never feel bad about requesting, giving or receiving feedback. you can’t know everything, so don’t expect it of yourself.
10) now, at this point in the evening, you can start to innovate. you can either have you partner lay you down and do the same thing to you. you can start to involve her yoni and clitoris. you can branch into massage, oral sex, sex, etc. be creative.
Remember, do not have an orgasm tonight. Use the evening to enjoy each other. Revel in each other’s taste, smell’s, and passion. Love and be loved. Find the freedom that comes from not trying to get somewhere.
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One of the most confusing things about being diagnosed with early stage prostate cancer is choosing if and how to treat it. Unlike other cancers that have one or two standard treatment options, acceptable approaches for prostate cancer are more numerous. Each has different pros and cons and the decision about how to proceed needs to be customized to each man, depending on his age, his general health, and the severity of his early prostate cancer.
Treatment options
· Radical prostatectomy is the surgical procedure that removes the prostate gland. The operation is traditionally performed through a vertical incision made in the pelvis. The man needs to be admitted to the hospital and recover for several days. The most worrisome potential long term side effects are urinary incontinence and impotence. A new technology is available: robotic laparoscopic prostatectomy. This method entails making five small incisions instead of one larger one. The recovery is expected to be faster and easier than with the traditional procedure.
· Radiation therapy has a cure rate comparable to that of surgery. The two forms of radiation therapy are external beam and brachytherapy, pronounced bray-kee-ther-uh-pee.
o External Beam Radiation Therapy entails the use of a radiation treatment machine, most commonly, a linear accelerator. Using sophisticated treatment planning computers and devices built into the linear accelerator, the radiation beams deliver a very precise dose of radiation to the intended area while sparing the normal surrounding structures, such as the rectum and bladder. By using 3-D conformal radiation therapy, the radiation beams conform to, or match the shape of the tumor. Intensity modulated radiation therapy, also known as IMRT, is a refinement of 3-D conformal radiation therapy. It uses multiple, tiny beamlets, instead of a single radiation beam. IMRT beamlets can be understood by visualizing it as multiple, tiny mosaic tiles of different hues of blue; the tumor receives the dark blue beamlets, whereas the tissue near the rectum and bladder receives the beamlets of the palest shade of blue.
This way, the intensity of each tiny beamlet is modulated. IMRT has enabled radiation oncologists to deliver much higher doses of radiation therapy to the prostate with fewer complications to the rectum, resulting in higher cure rates. Temporary and early side effects include the need to urinate frequently, diarrhea, abdominal cramping, and fatigue, which is usually not severe. Side effects that can develop months to years later include urinary incontinence and erectile dysfunction, albeit a significantly lower incidence than with surgery. With the advent of IMRT, the risk of rectal injury that can cause rectal bleeding is uncommon.
o Prostate Seed Implants introduce multiple radioactive pellets smaller than grains of rice into the prostate gland. The prostate gland then receives a substantial dose of radiation, but the surrounding tissues receive virtually none. This option is very attractive to men who are concerned about maintaining potency. Also, for men who do not have a significant risk of the cancer penetrating through the capsule that envelopes the prostate, a prostate seed implant can serve as the only form of therapy. However, men whose tumors fall into a higher risk category cannot be treated solely with a prostate seed implant, and need to supplement it with external beam radiation therapy, albeit a briefer course of treatment than in men who receive only external beam radiation therapy.
The disadvantages of brachytherapy include the fact that the radioactive seeds take several weeks to decay to the level of background radiation; during this time, men need to refrain from getting close to pregnant women and small children. Also, there is a low risk of rectal irritation in the short and long run. Infrequently, the need to urinate frequently can persist. Incontinence and impotence are relatively rare. The risk of a channel forming between the urinary tract and the rectum, also known as a rectal fistula, can cause urine to leak through the rectum. This complication is rare, fortunately, and can be repaired surgically.
· Cryosurgery involves freezing the prostate tissue with liquid nitrogen. Via the guidance of an ultrasound probe inserted in the rectum, needles are guided into the prostate, by piercing the skin between the scrotum and the anus. Short term side effects include blood in the urine for several days, soreness of the surgical area, swelling of the penis and scrotum, urinary burning, and frequency of urine and bowel movements. Late complications include nerve damage that can result in impotence and rarely, the formation of a fistula. Also, the long-term success rate is not well known.
· Hormone Therapy is also known as androgen deprivation therapy (ADT). Prostate cancer thrives on testosterone. By depleting testosterone, prostate cancer cells die. ADT has never been demonstrated to be a curative modality, but it is useful in holding the disease at bay for some time. Its other role is in shrinking the prostate prior to surgery or radiation therapy. Side effects are those of “male menopause”, such as hot flashes, weight gain, decreased mental acuity and depression. Other potential adverse effects include osteoporosis, anemia, breast enlargement, fatigue, diminished good cholesterol and loss of muscle mass.
· Watchful waiting is a reasonable choice for men who have a short life expectancy, as well as for those men who have very slowly growing prostate cancer and will most likely not die from prostate cancer but rather, from some other more life threatening problem. The down side of watchful waiting is the psychological implication that the man’s mortality is looming ahead of him. Although no active treatment is given, men are still followed with digital rectal exams, PSA levels and possibly, transrectal ultrasounds of the prostate. However, with low risk prostate cancer in an elderly man, this might be a fine option.
Apparently the spectrum of treatment options is vast, and ranges from doing nothing to undergoing radical surgery. To make the best decision for himself, a man should know his treatment options based on his individual situation and lifestyle. Then, he will be empowered by knowledge as he embarks on his journey into the world of medical opinions. Finally, he should choose an experienced specialist to ultimately treat and follow him.
For more information about radiation therapy, check out http://www.ASTRO.org, the official website of ASTRO, The American Society for Therapeutic Radiology and Oncology.
Copyright 2006 by Carol L. Kornmehl. All rights reserved.
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Genital warts are the most common type of sexually transmitted diseases. Warts appear around genitals and the anus of men and women. In women the warts occur outside or inside the vagina, or around the anus. In men they are found around the penis or anus. A genital wart often occurs in groups and can be very tiny or can accumulate into large masses on genital tissue.
A virus called Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) causes genital warts. There are 100 types of HPV are present but over 30 of these can infect genital tract. The types of HPV that infect the genital area are called genital HPV. This virus infects 50 percent of sexually active men and women.
There are two types of HPV: high risk HPV and low risk HPV. High risk HPV can cause cervical cancer while low risk HPV often cannot be detected because it does not show symptoms. Since it does not show symptoms, the risk of transmitting this low level HPV is higher. That is because you could have the virus but not even be aware of it. Therefore, check with your doctor regularly to find out how you are doing in the sexual health aspect of medicine.
The most common avenue of transmission is through intercourse with an infected person. About two-thirds of those having sexual contact with an infected partner will develop warts, spread during vaginal, anal, or oral sex. Their mother can infect infants during the childbirth.
According to the American Social Health Association, there are over 5 million new cases of genital warts infections reported every year.
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So, does penis size matter for women?
Yes, penis size does matter, but not in the way that you may think.
After asking several hundred women over 18 years old, sizes, ethnicities, and sexual habits, 82% of these women answered that were happy with a penis that was big enough to satisfy them, which averaged at about 6 inches, that is just about the average penis size for men. Of course, there was a small percentage (9%) who wanted a penis that was larger than average (7 to 8 inches). Fewer women (2%) said that they preferred huge-sized penises (larger than 10 to 12 inches).
Penises much larger than average can cause some difficulties during sex. In fact, many women who dated men with abnormally larger penises complained that they weren't able to comfortably enjoy certain sexual positions, nor were they able to adequately give oral sex.
But... when asked whether length or girth was more important, most women opted for girth, as they claimed to enjoy the feeling of a thick penis against their vaginal walls rather than having an unusually long penis poking against their insides. The length has to be proportional to the width. And what would that be? I suppose that would be the average.
Other important things:
56% expect a penis to more or less match the complexion of the rest of a man's body.
23% expect a penis to feel very smooth.
21% weren't very happy about an abundance of veins.
So, if you're below average, you have two options:
- there are other ways in which to satisfy your woman, so explore your options;
- you can also try some methods to enlarge your penis...
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It can be surprising to realize that an organ as high-powered and sophisticated as the brain also has a plumbing system. And, as the case with a house's plumbing, the drainage side of the system can get gummed up. But the symptoms are different. When a home's drainage backs up, well...I won't go there. When the brain's drainage system backs up, the brain's owner can become confused, incontinent of urine and unsteady on his or her feet.
The plumbing system in question is that which produces and drains the cerebrospinal fluid (CSF). Normal CSF looks the same as water from a faucet, but is created from the bloodstream in the choroid plexus tissue within three of the brain's four inner chambers -- the right and left "lateral" ventricles and the midline "fourth" ventricle, but not the interposed, midline "third" ventricle. The CSF percolates through passageways from one ventricle to another, finally emerging through openings at the base of the brain to bathe the outer surfaces of the brain and spinal cord before getting reabsorbed into the bloodstream again. This re-absorption occurs in special collection-nodes in the membranes surrounding the brain. The entire CSF volume of about 150 milliliters or five ounces (about as much as a glass of wine) is produced and reabsorbed four times a day, so the fluid is constantly turning over.
But blockages along the way can interfere with the normal flow of the CSF. For example, when the passageway between the third and fourth ventricles becomes narrowed or choked with sludge, the CSF backs into the lateral and third ventricles. Those ventricles react to the increased pressure by becoming physically dilated or enlarged. In this case, a CT or MRI scan could reveal the location of the blockage by showing expansion of the two lateral and the single third ventricles, but a normal-sized fourth ventricle. Another example of a blockage and its consequences is when the collection-nodes responsible for CSF re-absorption in the brain's overlying membranes (meninges) become clogged. In this case, all four ventricles are upstream from the blockage, and all four of them expand. This, too, is visible on brain scans.
Both cases are examples of hydrocephalus, or water on the brain. The first case is one of "internal" or high-pressure hydrocephalus. The second is called "external" or normal-pressure hydrocephalus (NPH). In NPH the pressure is inexplicably normal much of the time, but the term is somewhat misleading because prolonged recordings with pressure-monitors do show intermittent periods of increased pressure.
Hydrocephalus of one kind or another is especially prevalent at the two extremes of the life cycle -- in the very young and the very old -- but can occur at any age. In infancy, hydrocephalus can be caused by malformed brain-tissue. In contrast, adults with hydrocephalus were usually born with normal brain anatomy, but acquired a blockage due to a tumor, injury, bleed or infection. However, many cases of hydrocephalus in adults occur without a history of these preceding illnesses.
CT and MRI scans are sensitive tools in detecting hydrocephalus, particularly when it's striking enough not be confused with ventricular enlargement due to gradual loss of surrounding brain tissue from aging. The main treatment of hydrocephalus is for a surgeon to insert a tube (shunt) into one of the swollen lateral ventricles and provide an alternative pathway for the backed-up CSF to drain. Once the shunt equipment is in place, a piece of hardware about the size of a large button sits outside the hole made in the skull (but inside the skin of the scalp) and redirects the excess CSF through another tube into either a jugular vein in the neck or into the abdominal cavity (peritoneum). Thus, the patient can receive either a "VJ" shunt or a "VP" shunt, with the letters designating the locations of the two ends of the shunt.
The success or failure of shunting depends not just on the skill of the surgeon, but also on the selection of appropriate patients. Sometimes hydrocephalus turns up unexpectedly on scans when doctors are looking for something else entirely. Although an unexpected finding like this should always cause the doctors to re-think the case, the point is that hydrocephalus doesn't always cause problems. Sometimes the hydrocephalus has been there for years and the brain has adjusted to it in a way that produces no symptoms. This is an example of a case that should not be shunted, though it would still be appropriate to monitor the patient and his or her scans over subsequent months and years.
Who, then, should receive a shunt? The answer, in short, is people for whom the benefits of the operation exceed its risks. Identifying them, however, is the tough part. And the task is made even more difficult by the lack of randomized, controlled trials in which a group of patients receiving treatment is compared to an equivalent group of patients not receiving treatment. Although similar reasoning applies to adults thought to have internal (high-pressure) hydrocephalus, I'll lay out the decision-tree as it applies to external (normal-pressure) hydrocephalus. Published observations imply that shunts are most likely to help NPH patients who have the following features:substantial enlargement of all four ventricles a full "triad" of symptoms, including confusion, urinary incontinence and altered walking poor walking as the first of the three symptoms temporary improvement of symptoms after drainage of 50-60 milliliters (2 ounces) of CSF by lumbar puncture (spinal tap) The elderly patients most at risk for NPH are also at increased risk for other diseases, and the shunting operation doesn't help symptoms produced by other causes. For example, confusion can be caused by Alzheimer's disease and strokes. Urinary incontinence can be due to prostate disease in men and sagging pelvic tissue in women. Walking can be disrupted by arthritis, fractured bones, low vision, inner-ear disease, Parkinson's disease and many other unrelated processes.
So it's important for the doctor to determine if other diseases might be to blame for the very symptoms that seem, at first glance, to be from NPH. Assuming that NPH still seems likely, the next round of decision-making concerns the possibility that an operation will cause harm. Even a patient whose brain scan and symptoms are classic for NPH can develop serious complications from the operation. A particularly feared complication is bleeding into the space outside the brain, called a subdural hematoma. Older patients are also more likely to have other medical conditions that could compromise the safety of an operation, like coronary artery disease or emphysema.
Cases in which expected benefits of the operation are much greater than risks, or in which the risks are much greater than the expected benefits, are easy to make decisions about. But many other cases are in the gray zone in which potential benefits and risks are more evenly matched and the chances of doing harm with an operation come close to canceling out the chances of doing good.
(C) 2006 by Gary Cordingley
